Exclusion in the church

My friend, Paul Peterson has a great series of posts on his site written by Patrick Burk, a non-churchgoing friend who gives an honest and different perspective of churches and Christians. You can connect to all of the posts here. Although I don’t agree with all that is in the posts, I do think there is a lot of truth in what he has to say. I have commented on a couple, but would like to expand on Part 2–Why some people are not included here. (For common understanding, the word ’sin’ means those things either omitted or against God’s will/the Bible.)

Patrick reflects on the feeling that there is a double standard and sense of exclusion within Christian thinking and in churches in general. He gives examples of friends who were living together without marriage and one who was gay who were judged by their visible lifestyles and were ‘pressured’ out of attending church. Does that mean they are not Christian? Does it mean they should be excluded?

It’s easy to point out visible sin. But what about the abuser who hides all evidence? Can the man who struggles with lust or the woman who fights addiction be a Christian? Is one “more wrong” than another or is it simply about who hides it best? We all sin, no matter how hard we “try”. If people living together or are gay are sinners and should be excluded, then it goes to follow that if anyone gets angry, lusts, or judges others is not allowed either. There’s not a “hierarchy of sins” with churches deciding whoever is lowest on the totem pole is out.

Too often we admit we sin, but then have the mentality of, “Sure, I’m a sinner, but I’m not that bad.” But if I point it out in you, then maybe you won’t see the sin in me. It’s a great tactic of diversion. I am bothered by who you are or what you do because I don’t understand. It’s easier to see the differences than the similarities between us and in that we judge. Judging others creates distance. It keeps us safe within our boundaries. So I put you down and exclude you. In doing that, I put myself higher on the totem pole, and away from you. You see, if I get to know you I may see how much I am like you, and that makes it harder to judge you. If I get to know you, you may see that I struggle too and I’m not sure I can handle that.

Patrick comments, “In fact, I really do think that if Christ walked amongst us today he would be sickened by the sense of exclusion that has permeated some areas of Christian Churches.” I think too often we are afraid that if we accept others where they are, in all their struggles and faults, that we are saying we approve of their actions. And what would others think of us? It’s ok to minister or witness to (or judge) people who are struggling, but don’t make me hang out with them!

If I am following Jesus, I want to bring myself to be more like him, and to share and help others on that path. I want this not because I am better than anyone, not because they are a “project”, but because that is what I believe in with all my being and I want others to feel that too. I can’t do that by condemning and excluding.